you dont tan...

like you tan in the south of France.

Although tanning just across the border on a Spanish beach was almost as nice.

Also, mmmm cheese. And baguettes. Mmmmmmmm.

Did I mention I'm in the south of France?

Why can't you tell? I'm wearing all black and smoking a cigarette while looking effortlessly chic.

Mmkay, all that was a lie.

Except for the part about being in France.

That's just the part you wish was a lie.



amidst the silver lining

In the battle for his love, I am the uncontested winner.

In the battle for his attention, no amount of glances -coy or pleading-, cajoling, wheedling, bargaining, promising, or begging can pry him from the arms of his other lover.

I've told him we should get a pool boy.
Or a tennis pro.
Or a milkman.

Or at least a dog, because I've heard they're good attention-givers.

We'll see.