WalMart. Yeahhhhh.

Oh. Ye. Gods.

My local WalMart just reached Jerry Springer levels of trash. So, my mother, two other women, and I were all standing in the card aisle, discussing racism, religion, making art from unintentionally artful items, and just generally being the classiest haphazard discussion-group ever to grace the aisles of any Wal-Mart, ever, when we hear the sound of a lot of things falling off shelves all at once in the aisle directly behind us. At first, we thought a shelf or two had crashed to the floor- it was that loud a commotion. But alas, such a simple, innocent cause to the disruption was not to be.

Women- girls, really- were wrecking the store in one loud, angry, massive brawl mere feet from us. Employees rushed to the scene from all areas of the store, which only confused things more as the catty wenches having the fight were ...employeees. Wait, what? Yeahhh.

To be fair, only one was on-shift and in uniform at the time. The other was wearing street clothes, having come into the store on her time off, which somehow makes the whole thing that much sadder. And then it all reached a whole new level of pitifulness once I caught a glimpse of the guy who was apparently the object of mutual wench-affection. Seriously? You'd like to get fired over him? To each their own, I guess, but I've never seen the point of fighting over a significant other. If they're genuinely devoted to being with you, they will tell other people to back off. And if they're not saying that, then you really need to question why not. And I do mean seriously evaluate why this person you're with isn't making it clear to other suitors that they're unavailable. In most cases, it's because they don't really consider themselves unavailable. But enough preachiness, we already know I have very clear ideas about cheating and whatnot.

Yeah. Anyway.

The phrase "stereotypical black people" doesn't even BEGIN to describe this festering armpit of a town. It's sort of hard to get mad at people who stereotype black people when I live in an area where each and every one of those stereotypes is alive and well. Thriving, in fact.

But you know, at least there weren't bits of ripped-out dollarstore weave strewn around the place by the end of the melee, unlike on my first day of high school. Yeahhhh.


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